A letter to my child.
I wrote this and it made me feel a lot better and have more hope. ❤️
To our future baby (whom isn’t even conceived yet)
I already love you more than words can say. I have prayed for you, changed my life for the better for you, cried for you (a lot), felt lost without you, been poked and checked by doctors countless of times for you, and I have dreamt of you more than you could possibly imagine. I have wanted you since I was old enough to know what having a baby was, I watched your grandma bring me two wonderful siblings whom I consider my own (your aunt jo you’re gonna love her she is the sweetest little girl you will ever meet and uncle Jacob who has a heart of gold and will love you like I love you) and I instantly knew this was what I wanted to do. In the back of my mind I had always thought I might have to go through infertility but it is so different when it happens to you. I pray you never have to go through this baby but you are worth everything I have ever been through and I know when I get to hold you for the first time nothing will compare to that feeling. I love your dad so much and he loves me too, you don’t know this yet but he feels like he is responsible for you not being here as early as we would’ve liked for you too. He blames himself a lot, he wants you to he here just as badly as I do, I don’t blame him I blame myself too. I think the thought of us never getting to meet you in person scares us very bad but I know you are in heaven with my papaw spending time with him before you come to me please tell him I love him and I miss him. In conclusion dear, you are loved beyond measure already and as badly as I want you to be here I know you are worth the wait. “For this child I have prayed. ❤️”
Your patient mommy.