Big age difference in marriage

So my husband and I have a 21 year age gap. I honestly rarely think about it on my own... but he OFTEN brings it up and it seems to have a huge struggle with it. Everything from (what people must be thinking with their looks in public ) too I couldn’t possibly understand his perspective by I’m a “baby”. He DOESNT LOOK his age (he’s African American and “black don’t crack” lmbo ) and I don’t notice these “looks@ he sees in public etc. we have been married six years, we have three kids. But I’m wondering, how do other couples with age differences “cope” with it ?? I’m looking for some perspective. I feel like we’re both adults, it’s been over six years , I love him, he loves me, so get over it!! I just turned 29, I want to feel like he views me as his equal, no matter what the situation, and sometimes... I don’t feel he respects my opinion as equal or I feel our time in public is “tainted “ by him being SO CONCERNED with what everyone might be thinking. Thank you for your thoughts!!