Was it rape?

This has been on my mind for a couple months now and was wondering others thoughts.

In March, I went to a party and got really drunk. One of my closest friends called me an Uber and brought me to his apartment. I kept blacking out all night but I remember laying on my back having sex. And it hurt really bad. I was sore and in a lot of pain. He may have been drinking too but I know he was definitely more sober than me.

The next morning I woke up and felt gross and hurt. I haven’t seen him since this happened and haven’t talked to him about it either. I’m scared that if I say something, it’ll make it real.

We’ve had sex soo many times before but something about this makes me feel like I got taken advantage of. I may have flirted with him and started it but I’m just curious to know others opinions and experiences.