Feeling so broken & looking for advice

This will be long but I NEED some help or guidance or to hear similar stories.

Growing up I was under the impression that my family was close.. My cousins, aunt grandpa brother, parents. So fast forward to my pregnancy. My aunt was ecstatic that I was pregnant, even offering to be a second grandmother as she doesn't have any grandchildren. I told her, of course, and kept in touch.. the day I found out the gender I text her so excited and sent sonogram pictures that it was a boy! I got the most anti climatic response "ok I'm happy for you🙂". so I'm like

Well we drove practically across country, 5 months pregnant, in July, for my baby shower that my cousin hosted, since all my fam. was on the east coast (no biggie since they're faaammmily, right?) well things went pretty great and I started to get over the tension my aunt was creating since the gender thing. Now it's August, my birthday, and my aunt has gone ghost (mind you, she knows my birthday like one of her own children) I'm thinking to myself, like why wouldn't she say anything to me? (whatever) but then not a week later she is all over her ex husband's brother telling him happy birthday and hope your day is blessed (their divorce and marriage was messy) now I'm hurt and decide enough already, she wanted distance between us right? So I don't contact her, remove her from social media and give birth to my amazing son in Oct. Well I never here from my aunt again and she turned one of my cousins against me. So I try and do get close with my female cousin and she decides she wants to be in my sons life and I'm so grateful.

Bc I want my son to have an extended family. Well fast forward again... My son is turning 2 (still ZERO contact with my aunt) my cousin and I make plans for her and her husband to meet my son while I visited my brother (they live in the same city & state) my cousin shows up an hour and a half late with no apologies, no explanations.

I keep my mouth shut to keep the peace and move on. She's all over my son, they bond, great. we talk some after we leave (ONLY the day after we leave) I text her on Christmas wishing her a Merry Christmas ( things had gone silent between my son's birthday in October so I thought I'd do a little check in) got nothing. By New Year's weekend I was in a very bad car accident. She text me January 2nd letting me know that her mom, MY AUNT, told her I was in an accident. Told me to get well soon (k great) I broke 1 arm and fractured the other. SIX months later, she messages me. You could have told me y'all came down to visit. (We went out to visit bc my brother was deploying and honestly they didn't even cross my mind bc I was there for my brother to spend quality time with his nephew.)..... And that's where I snapped.

Like they have NEVER driven to come see us. They show up late when I come to them. They leave me on read for WEEKS at a time. They give me nothing but false hope with they're empty promises.... And yet I'm still trying bc I'm so centered on family (or on this fairy tale that can't exist in my world.)💔💔💔 My husband want me to close the door already and let them go (but they're the only family I have left. He doesn't speak to his & my dad's side is worse if you can believe that) When I have brought it up in the past to my mom about fixing it with my aunt she's tells me to leave it, and now that I told her the newest drama, she blames me for all of it.

I feel like my son is hated by my extended family (he is only TWO). It hurts so much. I just had this image of visiting family, becoming close, him being surrounded by everyone. My husband says I try too hard with them and I agree.... but what can I give my son in terms of relatives? He only has my brother and my parents, me and my husband. Is that enough? My mom says I should be working extra hard to fix things bc they're all I have (note: my mom has driven a wedge between my aunt and me since I was pregnant and everytime I try she tells me to stop or if I ask her to talk to her she says let it go.) My mom is mean as a snake to me BUT keeps the peace for my son's sake.... help me please. I'm hurting and vulnerable. Maybe my family is emotionally abusive? IDK