Just need to vent a little. Hubby and I got pregnant our last year of college (before marriage). I'm from NJ he's from OH and we went to school in OH. I had an awesome job opportunity lined up in OH before graduation but since the only family there were his parents 2 hours away, we decided to move to NJ to live with my grandmother and have the help of my dozens of family members close by. Anyway, I was always on good terms with his parents until we made the decision to move to NJ. Days after we told them, everything started falling apart. Originally they said hubby could take his car with him (which was in their name) but a week later they said nvm you have to buy your own. Ok no big deal, totally reasonable. So he starts car shopping then they told him he had to give them the money so they could buy it for him since their county requires special inspections. I was ok with it as they said he could still pick it out. Then all of a sudden they decided that they were going to use his money to buy his mom a new car (which they already had 3 for the 2 of them) and purchased a dirt bike for his brother. So they stole his car money for themselves 2 months before his child was due. So we graduate and move to NJ where I have a job lined up but he doesn't. I had to use my savings for our child to buy him a car since his parents took all of his and he needed a car to start looking for a job. After all that, he got a job, we had our baby, eventually bought a house, and replaced the beater I had to get him with something more reliable. All along the way, his parents blatantly disrespect me and him. When we give them our specific rules and wishes for our child, they essentially look at us and say "fuck you" (not literally but feels like it). I get it, sometimes grandparents spoil their grandkids but they go beyond that and basically do things just to piss us off. They think they're better than everyone else. They have since realized I see right through their bs and now they hate me more.

Fast forward a few years to our wedding where on numerous occasions his mother puts down every idea we have. She said "no I don't want to wear maroon it will look horrible with your coral bridesmaids" knowing those were our wedding colors. Fine you don't want to wear maroon but no need to diss our color choices. And don't put down our choices for the wedding you aren't giving us a dime to have.

Anyhow, I always try to keep it civil but the blatant disrespect to me and my husband and our home make it very difficult. My husband doesn't acknowledge how horrible they are because they're his parents and they can do no wrong and he doesn't have the balls to stand up to them. Except for one time when they were blatantly disreagrding his request for them to give him our child so he could discipline her for misbehaving at the restaurant and they refused them he finally stood up and said do not cross me when I'm trying to discipline my kid. (btw by discipline I mean take her for a walk and have a talk, not hitting, yelling, smacking, or anything bad).

My grandmother (who originally said I was crazy and who always loves everyone) has finally started recognizing the things they do and now fully understands what I've been dealing with this whole time.

So they are coming in 2 weeks when I am away and I basically told hubby my ground rules and he said why do you always do this when they come? He just doesn't see what I see. I'm just glad they live 7 hours away.

Any advice on how to deal with horrid inlaws?