Total Mom Fails 🤷🏻‍♀️

Ladies,

As mothers or mothers to be I think it’s important that we lift each other up, not put each other down. Being a mother is one of the hardest jobs there is and because of this we need constant support.

Every once in a while we do something that causes us to hang our heads in shame, something that I like to call a total “mom fail.” Typically I think we are too hard on ourselves. If our babies are healthy, happy, and loved shouldn’t we try to see the humor in our short comings?

I want to encourage all mamas to take it easy on yourselves; sit back and enjoy the rollercoaster that is motherhood. Nobody is perfect. With that, I’d like to share with you one of my “mom fails” that seemed oh so tragic while it was happening, but turned out to be a funny story that we can share with our daughter when she is older. At least she’ll know I love and care immensely for her well-being... right? So buckle up because this is a long one.

It’s a beautiful Wednesday afternoon, sun is shining, house is cleaned, baby is sleeping and I’m living the good life .

I decide to sit on our back deck and enjoy some of this wonderful Michigan weather that we get so little of. I grab my phone and baby monitor and set out to enjoy some sunshine and hopefully get some color on my pasty, pale skin. I lock the glass front door because I’ll be out back, and chances are if someone were to walk in the front door it would go unnoticed by me. Seems logical, right? I want to make sure my little nugget is safe from any possible intruders! Our back door that leads to the deck is a glass sliding door that has a “stick” that sits in the track while the door is closed, I assume the previous owner put it there for extra security. I move the stick, step outside and feel that wonderful sun hit my face. I think nothing of it, and close the glass door so as not to let any of our AC out. I’m sitting on the patio living my best life when I hear a loud click. I peak in and see my two cats sitting by the door, like two innocent angels, sun bathing. I think “aw how cute! I just love them!”

I go back to minding my own business. Noon is when baby takes her longest nap of the day, usually around 2-3 hours!! I’m really just enjoying myself. Shortly after I decide that it’s time to go inside. I’m sweating and am starting to notice my overly pale skin turning red. Better go inside before I get a sunburn! I go to open the glass door when it gets stuck... I yank, and yank, and yank but the door remains closed.

That... that is when the panic sets in.

I quickly realize that the noise I had heard earlier was the sound of one of my innocent angels playing with the security stick and pushing it horizontal, BACK ONTO THE TRACK. I panic. I’m running around trying to get the doors that I had previously locked to open. I realize quickly that this is a lost cause, and immediately call my husband. I’m sweating, I’m crying, I’m embarrassed that I could’ve let something so stupid happen. “I need you to come home immediately,” I say “the cats locked me out and Islas inside. I can’t get in! I need help.” He tells me he’s on his way, but he’s in a neighboring town, just returning from a lunch meeting with a client.... over an hour away.

So what do I do? I can’t sit here for over an hour and HOPE that my baby doesn’t wake up. If she wakes up she’ll start crying for me to come get her, and get hysterical when I don’t respond. Who knows how long she’d cry before I’d be able to get to her. I was a mess, the thought of listening to her cry on the monitor with no way of getting to her loomed over me like a dark cloud. I can’t do it, I need to get inside....

So I call the police. Yes, the police. I say to the dispatcher “I need help. My 3 month old daughter is inside and my cats have managed to lock me out of my own house. I need someone to help me get inside.” She sounded a little confused and I could tell she thought this wasn’t emergent since my baby was safely sleeping inside (and maybe she was right, but I certainly felt it was emergent!) but told me they would send someone, and that they would most likely just break a window to get in.

Whatever, I don’t care, do what you have to I just want to be inside my home with access to my sweet little girl. So the officer pulls up, sees me sitting on our front porch probably looking like a hot mess. Tears running down my face. Totally embarrassed. I explain to him my situation and showed him the monitor with my sleeping child on the screen. He was very nice, tried everything he could to break in without breaking the glass of my front door. Screw driver, credit card, knife, he tried it all. You would think this door was housing millions of dollars in a high security bank vault. We tried to open all the first floor windows, even though I knew they were already locked. I have no family nearby, no one has a key other than my husband. He also has the garage door opener. My keys are locked inside...

At this point I see no other option than to break the glass door to gain entry. It’s then that this cops makes a suggestion that I somehow had not thought of yet. He says “what about that window up on the roof? Is it unlocked?” I say yes, most likely. It’s on the second story, so I’m not as scared of an intruder getting in that way. I run next door and ask my sweet neighbor Tammy if she has a tall ladder. To my surprise she said “yes I absolutely do! Why?” And I explained to her my rather embarrassing and somewhat scary situation. She’s very happy to help, as I knew she would be. Luckily Wednesday’s are her day off. God was definitely looking out for me on that one! She brings the ladder over and the officer starts to climb but quickly gets down “my equipment is too heavy,” he says “you’ll have to do it.”

I’m very scared of heights and really not an adventurous person, but you know what? I put on my big girl pants are started to climb the ladder. I get to the top and I’m just short of the roof. Surely if I tried to jump I would fall, the gutter was in the way and there’s no way it would support my body weight. I tell him the situation and again, he does something I didn’t think of. Obviously this guy is way smarter than I am, I guess that’s why I called them in the first place. He climbs up the ladder behind me and tells me to stand on his shoulders so he could give me a boost. Seemed rather dangerous, but I was willing to try just about anything at this point. So I do as he asks. Sure enough, with a little help from my friend, I’m able to climb onto the roof. I notice that the screen had a hole in it so I start ripping. There was no way to get the screen out from the outside, the little knobs were on the inside. I rip the screen open and start pushing on the window, so scared that maybe I was wrong. Maybe I had locked it at some point. To my surprise, it slid open. Oh thank the dear lord! I live in a cul de sac and had now acquired an audience. I hear cheers from the officer and at least 2 of my neighbors. I did it! I’m inside! I run downstairs to unlock the doors knowing that my little girl was still happily asleep, having no idea of what had just occurred. I thank the officer repeatedly and he told me I needed to give Tammy a copy of our house key in case of another emergency. I happily obliged. I call my husband and tell him to stay at work, he’s no longer needed. I felt like a big ole’ idiot but at least it was over. Probably 30 minutes later my happy baby awoke from her nap, cooing and squealing when I walked in the room to get her out of her crib. I was thanking god that I was able to do that! When my husband got home he was not pleased, but understood that it was a freak accident. It’s safe to say that I’ve learned my lesson. After all, I was the idiot who left the stick too close to the door.

Thank goodness my daughter is (and was) safe and unaffected by my total mom fail.

I hope this was able to make some of you laugh and say “Thank goodness I’ve never done THAT.”

We’re all flawed but we’re trying our best. Our babies will thank us someday (and hopefully laugh and learn from our mistakes.)

Don’t be afraid to let me know about some of your mommy fails, I’m here to pat you on the back and tell you that I’ve been there! We’ve all been there.

Also, a picture of the culprits...🙄