my family is super fucked up and can never accept that they are wrong and will never. I had a wonder family, we all lived together, life was just great.... but my father was bored it seems like, so he went out cheated on my mother and got a girl pregnant but this wasn’t his fault it’s my mothers because she would have girls nights out and etc. My mother never kicked him out and they never told us about this little girl who is my sister. But maybe about 3-4 Years later, my dad begun to cheat again and this is where it went down hill... he was never home, he was always partying. And when he was home we wished he wasn’t he is very abusive not physically but emotionally... He used to get high or drunk and come home to my mom and talk shit to her telling her how she’s a bum and will never be shit which yet he never had a job and is very selfish with his money and lived off my mom didn’t pay one single bill in the house. He used to fight my mom when they got into arguments or just say things that really hurt us. So my mom left and moved with me and my little sister, he stayed there for 6-8 months and moved back to the state my father was, but when we moved he got the pregnant the one he cheated on my mother with and you know what he says to me and my sister til this day “I only did it cus your mother, it’s not my fault” BECAUSE NOTHING IS EVER HIS FAULT. Him and mom get back together like nothing ever happened, and I honestly hate it cus he’s hurting my mom, he’s fine one minute then the next he’s snaps for no reason. My mom got pregnant never told us til she was about 4 months, and he left her... and kept telling her to get an abortion... she didn’t. The night my brother was born the girl my dad got pregnant texts me and tells me she’s pregnant again so that’s now 6 fucking kids and I cursed her out and I was wrong for that ( me and the girl ended up getting close after she had my first brother) I wasn’t able to see my brother for about 2-3 months and I finally texted her and apologized. And she had the baby a year later she’s pregnant with a girl that’s now 7 kids 🤦🏼‍♀️ it’s all my mothers fault. I’m super depressed and I fucking hate my life, all I ever think about is killing myself but I won’t cus my little brother. My father is always saying how close we were and wishing we could go back to it but how could I just forgot everything and go back like nothing... it’s like saying sorry to a broken glass plate. I live with his grandma and I came down for the summer don’t know why but 🤷🏽‍♀️... so Father’s Day was yesterday and I wanted to get everything I could for my father to make it special, I went out my way. So I give him his present and everything’s fine... 1 hour passes and he gets into his mood. We went to a cook out at his family’s house, and he looked upset ig he didn’t talk at all and everyone was asking what’s wrong and he told them he couldn’t see his son on his birthday (my brother was Turning 1 ) and he was mad and I understand why he had every right to be but he blamed it on me and sister and mother which that has nothing to do with us I tried to make his dad the best it could ever be I don’t even know why I tried. I don’t have a relationship with my other brothers and it kills me because I really want one but the mother doesn’t like me and will never text me or call so I can see my brothers (I don’t live in the same state as any of them) so it’s not like I could just go to her house or have my dad bring me them. My parents bring me and sister into things like we are adults and when we have anything to say they yell and say we are kids stay in our lane.... I don’t get my parents anymore they make me so angry and I’ve been angry for years I have so much hate in my heart for my father and my mother for taking him back time after time I don’t like to watch her get hurt but it’s like she doesn’t learn her lesson. I’m stuck her July 26 and I. Wanna go back with my grandma I’ve been her since June 5 and it’s hell. Nobody understands how I feel they just say I’m wrong.... am I ? am I supposed to be angry and feel what I’m feeling ?