My husband of over a year has severe anxiety and CANNOT (and has never) ejaculate inside of me. This is inevitably causing issues as we want to start a family. :/

He has spoken to his PCP, who reassured him that it’s side effects of his medication and that he needs to just relax. He seriously can’t just relax and let go since he worries about everything constantly.

We have talked about it. We have tried to extend foreplay on him (spend more time on BJ or handjob before going into sex) but that hasn’t worked. We also only have sex maybe 3 times a month. I’m just losing hope about being able to start a family with all of this.

Can anyone relate? Any suggestions? I love him but I really want this issue to be resolved without hurting his feelings.

Also,

<a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">IUI</a>

and

<a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">IVF</a>

are not an option right now as my OBGYN wants us to actively try for at least 6 months first. We are both in our late 20s.

He has no trouble being turned on, or keeping it up. He can have sex for 30-40 minutes straight, but can only cum with a BJ or a handjob afterwards which can typically last between 5-30 minutes.

Update 6/26:

Thank you all for your comments. I have read each and have mentioned it to him. We booked an appt with my therapist for next week (she had been telling me to bring him in anyways). There is a 3-4 month wait for Psychiatrists in the area so maybe she can give him pointers on dealing with it his anxiety.

I also asked him how his sex Drive was before he went on the medicine (and he’s been on the same meds for 6-7 years) he said it was extremely high, and he’d masturbate like 20 times a month. RED FLAG. I did not know this obviously. I also asked him how often he masturbates since we’ve been married and he said only when I am away for work (which is only like every 2/3 months).

We do not have sex all of the time but we will please each other weekly or twice a week. I told him to just ask me for a BJ instead of masturbating. I am hoping to have some light shed on this situation ASAP. Thank you all again.

Update 7/9:

We’re working with a therapist and hoping to start a family soon. Thank you again for your responses!