I’m trying to gain weight and muscle but first I am just trying to force myself to eat more and actually eat meals.

I am 5’1 and 105 lbs, I haven’t been this skinny since I was literally starving myself in high school. I’m not intentionally going without food nowadays, but my toddler makes it hard for me to remember to eat and she steals half my food anyway lol. I’ve also been diagnosed with bipolar disorder so that explains how I can go a day without eating and not even notice (when i am manic) and then binge eat when I get depressed again. I’m seeing a therapist and starting meds for that so I’m getting help.

So I’ve basically been drinking Ensures, making sure I eat breakfast and dinner and snacking throughout the day (mostly healthy), but sometimes its so hard to force myself to eat because nothing sounds good and I’m just not hungry. I’m lucky if I can even finish a sandwich.

I hate it because now, big butts and hips and curves are considered beautiful and no one finds skinny girls attractive. So I’ve started to view myself as undesirable and feel like I look like a little girl and not a woman. I need help 😞