not again...

so... I need some advice/support, something... ive been touched without concent many times. honestly its like one of the first memories I have by a cousin. happened on and off from the age of 2-9 then my 'grandfather' did it an... I told... everything ended. I got sent to a wonderful shrink... after that I was always precautions, never trusted anyone, always very aware of my surroundings... but started hanging out with a bad crew just because I didnt fit in anywhere else... got on drugs... got off drugs.. had an eating disorder... got kicked out at 17... alone, confused an cautious no matter what... something completely changed me.. I had a baby.. I got life in order for them. then surprise I had another... they are a few years old now... and I just got married, signed up for school really planning ahead an looking forward to the future for once... but today... while i was outside smoking I had a neighbor come up an just stick her hand down my shirt an get my lighter. I share a porch with this woman... an... it just brought up old emotions... I'm depressed... not sure what to do... an no I couldn't stop her the way she was standing an reaching an I was sitting ... the place I live everyone around is friends this woman was suppose to be my friend. and our sons adore each other. best friends... but I can't do it... I've hid in my house with my kids all day... not really able to move right now either...

I do wanna day this though... you have no idea what someones story is. AND NOTHING gives you the right to touch them without concent. even it if it is your best friend.

please think about how ur actions will affect someone else before you do something. also... things do get easier. good luck to everyone who has been through something similar I wish you all a full life of happiness. 💕