So I went over to see my family last week and my second cousin is a year older than me where my other cousins are alot older than me, so we've always been close. Well we went into town last Friday night and got very drunk however I feel he wasn't as drunk as me. Anyways when we got back to his house we were talking then he kissed me and one thing led to another and we had sex. I woke up the next morning remembering it all and didn't want to see him. Because of his work schedule I didn't for two days when I did see him alone I asked if he remembered which he did and what he was thinking as he does have a girlfriend. Both completely sober at this point he was explaining that obviously we had a lot to drink but he didn't regret it and basically saying it was a 'normal' thing which really isn't ! I agreed saying that I didn't regret doing it but it wasn't our smartest idea. Later that night though we had sex again both sober I don't know what I was thinking, I wasn't and I can't lie I enjoyed it but now my head is so fucked and I feel guilty for his girlfriend and stupid I knew I shouldn't have cause he's family. Like should I feel this bad ? Like how fucked up is this ? I'm such a bad person😩🤦🏽‍♀️