I’m insane ☹️

Jordan • Married❤️ 🌈

HEAR ME OUT! I’m not currently trying to get pregnant as much as I WANT a baby... my husband and I have had 3 miscarriages and we have been seeing a specialist to figure out why I keep miscarrying. We are close to getting some answers and I won’t be on progesterone until August after some more blood work comes back such as stuff for my thyroid and other stuff. Anyways, I’m 2 days late. I’m never late. I miscarried in April but have had a period since. After every miscarriage I’ve had after my first period afterwards I’m always back on track. Well, I took a test and THERE WAS DEFINITELY TWO LINES for like five minutes as I’m freaking out in the bathroom and I splashed some water on my face and cry to my husband because if I am pregnant I’ll more than likely lose yet another one... then I come back and the second line is basically gone. I’ve had dye runs before, indents, evaps... the whole 9... this was different.. this is the test now. I don’t know what to think. I’m cramping like I’m going to start my period but I ALWAYS DO. All month long, even during my pregnancies. But my boobs are sore and they’ve only ever been sore when I’m pregnant... but who knows? Maybe I’m seeing things and I’m crazy. Maybe I’m about to start. Idk. All I want to do is cry. There’s part of me that wants to be pregnant cause maybe just maybe this little bean will stick... but I know in my heart I’ll just lose it... help me🙁