just kinda need to vent

im 35weeks today honestly ready for this baby girl to come out,totally over being pregnant... ok so before i got pregnant i struggled with alot with my body image i wouldnt eat and if i would i would vomit or make myself go poo to get it out if i didnt have that super hungry feeling i felt fat so i would vomit til i got there.amyways once i found out i was pregnant i stoped for the babies sake knowing it's not my body anymore its babies home..so i put on weight and at first i didnt mind but now i feel like a whale i gained 50lb this whole pregnancy found stretch marks about 2days ago and to be totally honest i dont know how i feel about it i just wana cry because i feel so gross...i understand that im pregnant and all this comes with it but i just want my body back i just hate seeing myself i know once shes actually here its only goin to feel so much worse im goin to be totally insecure and i dont know what to do...