Giving up

I don’t want to give up😣 every month AF shows up or I get the cramps a few days before I just know it’s coming again I really thought I did enough this month I’m taking evening primrose oil vitamins and use pre seed am I trying too hard? I’ve been trying for 3 years in December, I can’t talk to my partner about it he’s always up for trying new stuff but he hates getting his hopes up it upsets him so much when I’m late or when I take a test and it’s negative😣 we’re going through <a href="">IVF</a> in August and I’m scared because I think it won’t work😫 I know I can’t just say that as I don’t know but I’m so worried that if it doesn’t after the 3rd attempt I have to accept I can’t have children😣 I also have endometriosis which is even worse and my partner has low sperm. I know people say it will happen when it does but we’ve even tried not thinking about it and not talking about it or trying too hard but still nothing I’m getting to the point where I have to accept it’s not going to happen but I’m at that point in life where I’m thinking what was I even put on this earth for if I can’t do what a woman should? I just want to have a family I don’t care if I can’t have more than 1 I just want a blessing😫 it’s so hard and I know so many more women are longer TTC than me how do you maybe take your mind off it? If you do what do you have that distracts you from over thinking. I’m sorry for the big rant I just needed to get it off my chest as I can’t speak to my partner all the time❤️