Warning this will be a long post but I really need some insight

me and hubby have been together 5 years, married 1. we also have a 1 year old son. we were living with his parents for a while and recently got our own place and since then shit has been going downhill.

we weren't getting along because of how we each like to live cleaning wise, and he doesn't really pitch in for anything and just plays games instead.

Also, back in march we started an open relationship because he kept pestering me about how he wants experiences (hes 21, I'm 19) basically he wants a higher body count and to be able to hit on girls in the club. well I ended the open relationship week later, but when we moved in here a month ago I found he was still on tinder and stuff and we opened it back up again.

here's where things changed. it bothered me a lot the first time but this time, I dont care. it's like he tells me about these girls and I really dont feel jealous anymore idk what happened.

since we started this again tho I've been talking to someone and he treats me exactly the way I wanna be treated. I had been contemplating separating back in march but talking to this guy brought those feelings up again.

so I ended it with the guy.

i decided i have to figure out if i want to separate for me or for someone else. well i spoke to my husband about my concerns and not giving attention or being a part of the family anymore because he only ever plays games and goes on tinder. well he blew me off and then a few days later started being more attentive and things have been good. but I still have this feeling of wanting to move on.

I just feel like I've been begging him to treat me a certain way for 5 years and now it's just too late but we have a son and a marriage and I dont wanna just throw that away.

I just need to know if I'm thinking rationally about things or not.