Am I weird?

So I have a bf who I love very very much. I hope one day to marry him and he be my last. But when it comes to the bedroom I enjoy having threesomes with him with another female. I actually squirted the other night watching him perform so to speak. I feel guilty because it’s like I love this man and normally a woman shouldn’t want to see their man with another woman sexually but it excites me and when we have sex it’s like fireworks and TNT going off. Am I weird? I feel dumb at least that’s what my sis tells me is that I am gonna ruin my relationship. Is this true?