I didn't know being a mom would be so lonely. I just feel so blah. I haven't showered, don't have time to. I sleep a couple hours but I'm still exhausted and just want to sleep all day. My house is a wreck and I have no desire to clean it. I haven't even taken the trash out. Diapers everywhere from night changes when I'm too tired and just throw it across the room to get later. I just feel so sad and mentally exhausted. I wish someone just lived with me while hubby was at work to help me. The nights are so long and I'm on my own with the twins while he sleeps. They are a month old today and it doesn't seem that much easier. I just want help. Why can't I handle my babies on my own? I'm an adult. I'm a mom. I'm just so overwhelmed. I have no desire to hurt myself or the babies, please understand that. I just have no desire to care for myself at this point. Idk how to explain it.