Who is she?
I honestly never thought that I'd have to post something like this. I'm usually the one giving advice but here I am seeking help. 😔
A couple weeks ago my husband and I were in the car, he was about to call his foreman and started going through his recent call log to get the number. His phone was connected to the car so I'm seeing the log on the screen. Anyway, the usual calls to me, mil, fil, sil, and a few friends I know are there. I wasn't really paying attention until I saw a name I've never heard him speak.
I go, "hmm, who's Candice?", he didn't answer but kept scrolling. I just smiled to myself and figured maybe she's someone he's working on some type of surprise or event planning with. He's always planning something, like birthdays, anniversaries, vacation stuff..so I gave him the benefit of thinking maybe it's a surprise and he's not gonna tell me yet.
Two days later and it's still not sitting well with me. I'm ready to find out who this Candice is. I started thinking the worse but I'm not one to jump to conclusions without first talking to him. He was at work so I texted him and said, "hey, not sure if you heard me the other day when I asked, who Candice was. Is she the person you booked the suite with or something?" He left me on Read for two days. He worked a few days overtime so I didn't have a chance to bring it up face to face.
All this time we're planning a trip so I didn't want to create any tension so I figured I'd leave it alone until we came back. A day before we leave though I asked him why he never responded to my question and he goes "I didn't even see that until I was finished working and about to hit the showers and forgot to answer". That was all he said on that and walked away.
I again, gave him the benefit of not jumping to conclusions. I know all his cousins, ex girlfriends, social media friends etc. and again, I've never heard mention of anyone named Candice but I again, didn't wanna ruin our trip so I decided to not bring it up again.
3 days into our vacation and we're at a gas station, he's on the phone with his dad. He hung up and got out to pump gas. I'll admit that seeing his phone unlocked and on the call log. I started thinking about this new name again, so I snooped to see if he had anymore contact with her since that few calls I noticed. Lo and behold, she's no longer in his call log. The name has been erased. I checked my phone to confirm the date I sent the text asking about it to make sure I was searching the right timeline. He had purposely deleted her from the list. Every other call was there for up to 8weeks but that one.
At this point, idk what to think. I've taken my own advice and asked him multiple times and he has avoided the question. Now, he can't claim he didn't hear or forgot to answer, because he clearly went in and deleted the person from his log. Red flag? I honestly don't know what to say to him that wouldn't come off as argumentative or crazy.
I went the rest of our vacation enjoying it, didn't say anything and he doesn't know I went through the phone. I didn't search text or social media or anything crazy like that, just the call log and just that one time.
Should I ask him to see his phone? should I bring it back up to possibly be ignored or create an argument? should I leave it alone?
There was no Candice on our trip, we stayed at his aunt's home. I met all his cousins again (it was a family reunion) no Candice. I can't get the questions out of my head now. I really wanna know Who is she?
Sorry if my post sounds crazy, I'm using talk to text and trying to edit as I go. I'm also rambling because I wanna explain so much without sounding insane lol. Anyway, please help!
UPDATE*** I spoke to him and he first laughed, hugged me and said, "that was my contact list, I was scrolling to find a number in the C category, that's why you seen the name. I will delete if you want, since I haven't spoken to her in over 8yrs"..I felt like a total ass but I'm glad I followed my mind and not approach him all hostile and shit.
I guess knowing how easily he could've been cheating has me paranoid so I just let my mind roam. We've talked and agreed to always come to each other before assuming. I haven't asked him to delete anyone and I'm not gonna start now. I've gotta let my past hurt go and realize that I have a good man and stop making a mountain out of a molehill.