Am I crazy??

I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I feel so lonely, but a boy asks me on a date and I reject him. I never know what I want. I’m constantly looking up topics on eve to validate any action I made. I feel like I’m always on the edge of breaking down. I have so many things that I want to say but I don’t know how to express them. I feel like I just need a hug. Or some human physical contact. Does anyone else ever feel this way?? Send me some good vibes please 😭