I’m due in early October with baby #1. I am currently not working because my partner is financially able to provide for everything, and I was finishing up studying and he didn’t want me to have extra unnecessary stress especially since I am pregnant and I have lost 2 babies, one in the second trimester so my mental health wasn’t great to begin with.

I loved studying, had great people around me all the time and really enjoyed my course and would laugh all day every day. It really was my escape. Truth be told, I was dreading the course ending because I’m at a very different stage in my life from my college friends, and I knew deep down no one would keep in touch.

The course ended in May, so since then I have just been at home all day alone while my other half is working. I still have just under 3 months to go and it feels so isolating. He works 9-5 mon-fri. All the friends that I do have live kind of far, or they are busy working or with their own partners etc.

I don’t know if what I’m feeling is depression or am I just feeling really lonely? I’m scared about when the baby does arrive, I’ll be isolated even more from friends because I’m the first to have a baby, and they will lose the little interest that they do have in me. I don’t want to burden anyone by telling them how I feel or make them feel obligated to make time for me. It just feels so shitty.

I always was very meticulous about my appearance and took great pride in it, now I barely get dressed. What’s the point? The only time I get out during the week is if I have any appointments regarding the pregnancy.