Am I a horrible girlfriend?

I have anxiety, I’ve had a rough upbringing and have my fair share of traumas. For the longest time, I struggled with all of these internalised insecurities and traumatic memories. My boyfriend is an amazing guy, he’s incredibly patient, loving and he’s the reason I’m now more outgoing, he’s encouraged me always and I think I’ve had a lot of self-growth in the 2 years since we started dating, mostly because of him.

But I tend to lash out when i get anxious, or start to have feelings to self harm (I’m a year clean from cutting, yay for me :/) or when frustrating comes on quickly. Not physically, but I’ll verbally snap at him when he’s only trying to help. I don’t realise it at the time, but afterwards I know I’ve hurt him. I know I need to work on my patience, I love him deeply and the last thing I ever want to do is hurt him so I know I need to work on these sudden bursts of rude attitude. I used to be such an angry person, even as a kid. I feel like ever since I’ve met him he’s helped me without knowing it. Does this make me a horrible girlfriend to him? I feel so guilty and horrible, He’s a wonderful guy and I know I need to work on my anxiety and lessen the severity and occurrence of this bad attitude.