I will try to keep this short.

I dont know what to do....

Hubby and i will be married 3 years tomorrow and will be 26 and 27 next month.

I dont know if we should take a leap of faith and try for a family in October or not. I am still scared to death about raising a family. I don't like change very much.

I am on bc and have been for 7 years.

In october i will be at my job for a year and will receive FMLA. My job is so demanding i cant imagine taking time off for a family. I fear i will never be ready to have a baby.

I know hubby is very frustrated with me and doesn't want to be intimate much anymore.

I feel mad angry sad.... Doesnt help that family keeps saying your next but they have no idea the personal struggles we face because of me.

How can i change my ways for the better.