Since pregnancy and the excessive weight gain and unable to get my prebaby body back. My husband and my sex life has suffered greatly. We hardly have sex now. He’s not very attracted to me because of my “gut” and extra fat and no muscle tone at all. I try to work out but I can’t ever stay consistent. More than half the time I’m too damn tired or have too much to do. I know, I’m making “every excuse to not workout”. It’s just hard. And I honestly HATE being hot and sweaty. It’s just something I absolutely hate feeling.

Moreover, my husband also says I’m boring. He’s the second guy I’ve ever slept with and I’m probably the 50th girl he slept with. He says my inexperience is not an excuse because we been together for 9 years and I “don’t care to try and learn things.” So he believes bringing in another person (for three-sums etc.) will help our sex life.

I’m just lost at what to do. I don’t know what I can do to make our sex life more exciting. I can work out more and try harder to get my prebaby body back. But he still wants to be able to see other people because he says he can’t just be with one person forever. He needs to switch it up sometimes. We have had three sums and double bjs in the past (with other women). But we ended up getting a STD from a friend of ours. It really did a number on me and the symptoms I had were horrible (very bad odor that took weeks to go away). So ever since then I’m so scared to continue this lifestyle. But he says we can just use condoms. BUT STILL. It’s scary out there. Sure the STD we got was curable but there are some that are NOT. And if we are going into the “swinger lifestyle” and hooking up with other swingers , chances are they are also hooking up with OTHER SWINGERS. I’m also not the type to just sleep with anyone. Hence why my husband is the second person I’ve ever had sex with. I need to build a relationship with the person (I know it’s corny) but that’s just how I was raised.

I just don’t know what to do.

Any advice on anything will be appreciated!

How to spice up our sex life, what I can do to be better at sex, etc. etc.

*** Thank you ladies for your very kind words and advice!! I really do appreciate it.

I have some thinking to do .