So, a little background. My husband and I conceived our son on our first try back in 2015. He’s now almost 2. I wanted more than anything to give him a sibling and we started trying back in February. My cycles were off, though. My luteal phase was much too short and I was getting my period 9 days after ovulating. I knew I was going to need help and not being one to sit around and wait, I met with an RE in April.

He wasn’t very concerned. I’m only 31 and had already successfully had a child. He wanted us to keep trying on our own for 6 months, then come back to see him if nothing happened. I was dismayed. I wanted a quick fix, of course. Who doesn’t? He had me scheduled for CD3 blood work as standard procedure and I prepared for my next cycle. I got a call a few days later - the RE wanted to see me to discuss my results. Okay, no big deal. Two weeks later, we met.

And my world shattered.

My AMH was 0.5. Diminished ovarian reserve, he told me. I was headed into early menopause. I had initially met with him thinking I might need something like Clomid, but now I was being told <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">IVF</a> was my best and only hope for baby #2. He said I could try Clomid or <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">IUI</a>, but he felt I would just be wasting my time. At the end of the appointment, I spoke with an advisor, who told me the insane amount it would cost me to do a single cycle. I was looking at, at least, $18,000 including drugs for one retrieval. I drove home numb, speaking to my husband natter-of-factly on the phone, like I was reporting the weather. Then I visited my parents and broke down. I couldn’t afford <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">IVF</a> and who knew how much time I had left. My mom was almost as upset as I was. She had struggled for more than a year to conceive my younger sister and knew how badly I wanted a 2nd child, as she had. At that moment, without hesitation, my parents offered to pay for everything. Just so I’d have a chance and no regrets. I accepted their generosity, but had no idea what I was getting into. I was simultaneously terrified and excited.

I was scheduled for cycle 2 months later and a battery of tests were ordered. More money that my parents handed over without batting an eye. I was placed on birth control until the clinic was ready for me to get my period. My husband was finally scheduled for a semen analysis and the results weren’t great. Low count, low motility, low morphology. But ICSI is standard at my clinic, so it was workable. They scheduled a second analysis to double check the numbers.

And it got worse.

There were 2 usable sperm. In his ENTIRE sample. How?! How could we conceive our son so easily and be having all these problems only a couple years later? We were informed that a procedure known as TESE could be done to extract the sperm directly from my husband’s testicles. The RE said he thought it would be successful, but it would be best to have donor sperm on back up, if we were willing. We were, and a week later, our clinic had 2 vials of sperm on hand, should the TESE fail.

It was at this time that I got my genetic results back. I was a carrier for Beta Thalassemia, nothing terrible when you have the Minor version, but often fatal before 30 if you have the scarier Major form of the disease. It was now time for my husband to be sent for genetic testing, as well. I just couldn’t keep taking this bad news.

At this time, I started my stims. I had already been giving myself a couple shots a day prior to this and they really weren’t that bad. Now, I was up to 5 shots a day. I went in for my first ultrasound after 7 days of stimulation meds. My e2 levels were low, but thankfully, my follicles were growing. The dr ordered meds for another 3 days, and I continued on, wondering if I was responding well enough, if my cycle might get cancelled before I even made it to retrieval.

But I did make it to retrieval. I stimmed for 12 days and performed better than my RE could have hoped for. On the day of my retrieval, my husband produced a fresh sample in the hopes that it would be good enough that he wouldn’t need the TESE. He didn’t. His sample still wasn’t great, but they got what they needed, plus were able to freeze some in case we needed a 2nd cycle. We also hadn’t gotten his genetic results back, which weighed heavy on my mind. What if he was a carrier of Beta Thalassemia, too? 30 minutes after my husband’s sample was checked I was sedated for collection. Upon waking, I was notified that they retrieved 10 eggs, 8 of which were mature. I was ecstatic. I had thought I would be lucky with 5. The next day, I was informed that 6 of those eggs fertilized normally.

The next few days were filled with anxiousness. My clinic doesn’t give daily embryo updates because they think it causes undo stress. So I was forced to wonder how our embryos were doing without any kind of reassurance. At this time, we got my husband’s genetic results back. No Beta Thalassemia!! But he was a carrier for Cystic Fibrosis. As I wasn’t a carrier, this wasn’t something to worry about, but it did explain his fertility issues.

5 days after my retrieval, I went in for my transfer. I was informed that 2 of my embryos had made it to the blastocyst stage, with one hatching. They were good quality. Not amazing, but good and we were told transferring both was our best bet. So that’s what we did.

Of the other 4 embryos, 2 were lost early on and the other 2 needed another day, though there was no guarantee that they’d make it. But they did! On day 6, my clinic had 2 embryos to freeze, giving me a grand total of 4 blastocysts out of 10 eggs retrieved. I was told that this was an excellent number.

All that was left now was to hope that my embryos and body could work together and get me pregnant. 2dp5dt, I started to feel crampy and I was terrified that nothing would change and I would get my period early, despite being on progesterone. But no period came and the cramping continued. In fact, it increased. So today, at 5dp5dt, essentially 10 dpo for someone in a normal cycle, I took a pregnancy test.

And it was positive.

My journey has been shorter than many, but it was filled with plenty of ups and downs and heartache. I’m still very early in this pregnancy and I know anything can happen. I don’t even know if there’s 1 or 2 babies in there. But I’m so SO excited. I was so convinced I was out this cycle and I’ve never been happier to be wrong about something.