Love lost

I've been in love with my best friend we finally decided to take things to the next level. I'm more in love with him then he is with me because he's still in love with his ex. So we both we're recently engaged that didn't work out. His ex was cheating and I found out my fiancee was gay. If didn't occur I don't think we would have been dealing with one another. Long story short we have been dealing for years since both of our breakups. I thought we was in an relationship but I found out we're not and we're had an baby. I want love and everything that comes with it but I'm tired at this point. What I thought was perfect has been so wrong. Van u be above with two ppl at once.