Kay so at my last appointment my OB said my bp was high and my baby is small (21st percentile) and theres a lot of fluid in there. So they ordered another US for this Friday to monitor her growth and her lungs, etc. The next day I woke up and my hands were so swollen I couldnt make a fist and i could barely even pick up my phone. I havent had any swelling during my pregnancy AT ALL so this was abnormal for me. I went to the hospital and they monitored me for a while, my bp was 140/90. They said that’s pretty high. My ob came in a couple hours later and gave me the okay to go home.

Now I just panic all day every day. Im so worried about the baby. Im doing kick counts twice a day. Im overthinking every tiny thing. Im a mess. Can. Not. Stop. Panicking. Im trying really hard to remain calm for the baby but then I overthink it and get worried that I am hurting her. With my panic disorder I just dont feel like it is safe to keep her in there anymore. I will be 37 weeks on Saturday and I want them to induce me so she will be okay. Im constantly afraid of placenta abruption due to high bp and stress. Constantly panicking that she isnt getting enough. I just want this over with. I know the NICU will take good care of her if she needs it and I dont feel like my body is safe anymore.