Feeling frustrated

I have never been on any form of birth control. I thought getting pregnant would be easy. When my husband and I were only dating we had our scares now we are wanting children and nothing. I feel frustrated and guilty. My friend tells me how lucky I am to feel my body ovulate every month yet she doesn’t know how much it hurts. My periods are so miserable 😩 my cramps feel like I’d imagine contractions would as I have successfully used breathing methods and birthing positions to get through them. Often I vomit several times. Vomiting is either induced from the cramping or the migraine. It a punch in the stomach and kick in the head and a pull at my heart stings every month. My friends and family don’t know how hurt I feel. I act like there is no rush to get pregnant it will happen when it supposed to. But I am so ready to be a mom. My job is taking care of babies and now I want my own.