Okay I have to share with someone. My best guy friend (B) has been since 2014, the same year I lost my virginity to him. We weren’t ever together, but were, but not technically, it’s a whole thing. Ya know how it goes. So In 2015 we had a miscarriage, a son we posthumously named James Emerson. It was really rough and we considered like moving in together and trying again for real. He was making really good money at 19 in an air force career, I was at a private college in LA. I met this other guy, and ended up dating him for 2 (regretful) years. This asshole made me stop talking to B and I actually got removed from school because of the asshole, that’s a story for another time. So January of 2018 asshole and I break up and I start talking to B again. Mind you neither of us are particularly possessive of the other, we’ve been through so much we explicitly trust each other. He’s still emotionally stuck on his ex, which he fully admits to, but she doesn’t really reciprocate his feeling, and she’s leaving the county for at least a year for work. Now I met another guy in March of 18 and we started dating. April I found out I was pregnant, and by June the guy had totally bailed. I wasn’t heartbroken but I realized it’d be a difficult road ahead. Baby daddy is no where in the picture, also no where in the country. B has stepped up incredibly. He has no obligation to stick around but he’s being super supportive. He sends me Pinterest links about pregnancy hacks, he texts me to make sure I take my meds, he’s bought baby stuff, not cause I can’t but because he wants baby to have stuff from him. He’s on the birth plan, he’s taken my mom and I out to dinner for her birthday, we’ve talked to a lawyer, at his decision, about putting his name on the birth certificate. (Something she initially advised, but it won’t be necessary to keep baby daddy away if he ever decides to show up, not that I want to keep him away per say but it’s clear I can’t trust him). So Sunday night B and I were out getting getting dinner, and after dinner I blew him in his car. Something I honestly haven’t done with him since 2015. It wasn’t actually sex, but just the overall comfort of having him near me was incredible. It was just this undeniably intimate moment that started four years ago when I gave my first blow job, of course to him. It was so nice to feel that stability and comfort, to know he’s always been there and will continue to be. Neither of us are in a place to really be in a romantic relationship as of now, but I feel that our current situation kinda transcends predisposed classic labels. Honestly if he and his ex get back together in a year when she comes back, I don’t feel like it’d be a problem. I’m not threatened by her, and I don’t feel jealous because I know he’s not leaving me for her, or vice versa. I’ve been in polyamorous relationships before and I feel like if that’s where we’d be headed, I wouldn’t have a problem with that. I’m just really content and I had to share with someone how my life is going.