Those who have been in love several times and are in love now - how do you feel about your past loves?

Question

Do you look back on your past loves as a learning experience? (regret or no regrets?) Also with each new person/current person you're in love with you do you look back and think the others actually meant less to you than you thought or will a part of you always love them?
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​I know it's all relative depending on how those past relationships ended but I wanted to hear your own stories about this situation if you've come across it!
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​My story is that I'm truly and deeply in love and he's the first person I've felt this sort of love for. We've been together for just under 2 years (I'm 22) but about half of that has been long distance because of circumstances. We recently had a Serious Chat about The Future and unfortunately realised that there's no way for us to be together in the same city anytime soon. Neither of us wants the other to compromise their current life plans for the other especially  whilst we're still at this young stage in our lives. So we both decided its for the best to end it now rather than leave our love and friendship to disintegrate later... It's been an extremely difficult decision but at least we still love and respect each other and we'll still be in touch as friends.

​So I can't really answer my own question but I've been thinking about what it would be like if I were to fall in love with someone else. I know it's different for everyone but please enlighten me with your stories!

Answer

I thought i was inlove before but i now met an amazing guy who made me realize the difference between someone who wants attention & someone who actually cares

Answer

So I know right now you are probably worried you are never going to find someone like the guy you just ended it with and you will never be in love like that again, but I promise you it's not true. There will always be someone else. After a few months you will look at the memories with this guy and think of them with happiness rather than sadness and regret.

Answer

Thought I was n love w/a guy when I was 14 things happened and 1yr later I started dating his friend (now my hubby of 7yrs)  I still resent him but I still care what happens 2 him

Answer

Ive only loved one other person the way I love my husband and yah I'm still attracted to the guy and still love him on some level as he was the guy who made me feel comfortable enough to trust men after my dad walked out on my family and moved from canada to Australia. So I'll always love him from my past. But my husband is my future and my present. And I'll never love my husband the way I love my son. On a scale of who I'd save in a fire first, it would be my son, my cats, my husband and then my lizard. And he knows that too lol.

Answer

I have only been with my current boyfriend and no one else ever, but even with him it is like I had to let go some things from the past, cause we both changed a lot these past 3 years. Sometimes it feels like he is a completely different guy now, and I miss some things from the begginng :/

Answer

That's the Past

Answer

Awh I'm so sorry you have to go through this- although you really did make the right decision by ending it. I have been in only been in one long term relationship.While we were together i felt as though I was so in love with him and I couldn't imagine ever being with anyone else- until one day I didn't feel the same anymore. Our relationship ended on bad terms so I never find myself missing him, but instead I miss the memories we had during the good part of our relationship. Right now I am in a very lusty and casual thing. Although I do have very passionate feelings for this guy, they are very different feelings than that I had for my previous  boyfriend- but that is exactly what I am looking for at the moment.

Answer

*hug* I can relate so much to what you're going through right now with the distance and the time not being right. I've had 4 partners over appx 20 years. The first I thought I loved... I'm indifferent to his memory now. The second I spent almost a decade with and married. I have no regrets. We loved each other, I wouldn't be who I am today without having had him in my life. The third is the only one who ever made my blood boil and my knees buckle. I love him fiercely, even now. I fear my heart will never fully heal. The fourth I love deeply, but we're from different cities and in no position to close that distance. He's the most mature, adventurous, sweet guy I've been with. He's a good match in almost every way. But, while he's the best cuddler imaginable, I don't feel the burning passion. So I'm single, not a bit interested in someone new. Just haunted by an ex I thought was the one and by love for a man I just can't find my way to at this particular moment.

Those who have been in love several times and are in love now - how do you feel about your past loves?

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