Struggling internally with gender disappointment

Is anyone else struggling with gender disappointment?

I feel like an awful mom for feeling like this, but I can't help but feel it.

I have 2 beautiful boys age 4 and age 1.

I just found out our 3rd child is also a boy.

Don't get me wrong I adore my sons and I love this new little man very much, but I've always wanted a daughter. And now I am disappointed for a 3rd time.

I don't really want to have anymore children after this one, but I still ache over never having a little girl of my own.

We have had a name picked out for 3 years that we are never going to get to use. Its heart breaking for me.

My husband family will be happy it's another boy because more men to carry on the family name, but it just hurts that I will never have a little girl.

I am out numbered. My husband is male, my 2 soon to be 3 children are male, even our 2 pets are male. I am the only female and i just feel crushed inside as it's something I've always dreamed of and will now never have.

I don't have anyone to talk to about this because everyone just says I should be happy that the baby is healthy, or that I can have kids at all. I love my sons and I would never change them. It's just hard letting go of a broken dream.......

Thanks for listening.💔