Husband suffering from depression (help?!)

Question

Hey guys. So my husband has been suffering with depression for a while now, on and off. He has his good and bad days but they are mostly only bad. I am 35 weeks pregnant and honestly I am suffering with him. He never wants to do anything, go anywhere. He is always either at work or sleeping. He does not believe in taking antidepressants or seeing psychiatric doctors. I am trying my best to help and support him. I listen to him, let him vent. I baby him and am very cautious about what I do or say around him. I try to give him hope and support his goals that he often forgets he ever had. I don't know what else to do. I don't want to be selfish but honestly I need support too. I'm about to become a mom and I have so much going on. I want someone to lean on and someone to tell me I'm gonna be ok. I wanna know I have that back bone but I can't tell him all this because I know it will get him down even more knowing he's not being and can't be supportive.

I know my hubby's depression has to do with his dead end job that he is pretty much stuck in. (He can't change careers its too risky as we need the money) He has gained a ton of weight from comfort eating and the weight gain makes him even more depressed and then he eats more. It's a cycle.

His baby sister had cancer and that effected him tremendously. Thankfully, she is in remission now. And previous to becoming pregnant I was sick with fibromyalgia which caused me to leave work on disability. I feel better since falling pregnant though I Am still not working.

Basically, his world fell apart around him and he never took care of himself, only others and now he is falling apart.

I would love some advice on what I can do to help him if you or anyone you know had been through this please let me know. Thanks in advance.

Answer

So sorry to hear this. I've gone through some times of depression as well, and a supportive partner makes all the difference. If he's not open to medication, he could really benefit from seeing a psychologist (they don't prescribe medication) or a councelor. I hope he can put his problems aside after you have the baby, because you're going to need a lot of support as well. You sound like a supportive spouse, he's lucky to have you!

Answer

Call a family intervention and get him some help darl because once you have a baby you are going to have to give most of your time and love to the baby. You need his support, if you keep going like this you will run out of steam and that's not good for you bubs or your partner. Hopefully his family can't help you get him on the right track. I know he is going through a horrible time but it's also though for you and your pregnant.

Answer

It took time for me to convince my husband to see a therapist but it was worth it. He is still getting help and working through his pain and slowly healing. I had to help him understand he wasn't able to "fix" this on his own. It is hard. You sound like a wonderful spouse who loves your partner very much. Marriage is a partnership and you need him now. He needs to make his family and his health a priority to get out of that cycle as soon as possible. It must be his choice but you can help him get there. I pulled in the whole family, whether my husband wanted it or not, because he became suicidal. You got this. There is hope and you're not alone. All my love to you and your family

Husband suffering from depression (help?!)

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