I've come to a realization that my baby boy will be in my arms soon. And I am afraid of the unknown of labor and pain. But then I thought about my beautiful mother that has passed away 7 years ago, how strong she was when she had cancer or how she pushed all of my siblings and I out without any sort of epidural or pain medicine in Thailand. I then started crying because MY mind has been so busy thinking about my son. I miss her so much and soon I'll be a mom. I wish she could experience this with me. I know she's looking down and guiding me.. I am scared but when I think about her, I know that I'll be okay.

39W5D