Feeling gross

I’m 14 weeks and even though I have only gained 5lbs, I feel absolutely disgusting. I have been so sick since week 6. Between throwing up, eating crap junk food because I can’t stomach anything else, not showering for days at a time because I don’t have the energy, and being depressed/anxious, I just feel so unattractive. I haven’t gained too much weight but I have definitely lost muscle and gained fat/inches. I haven’t had sex with my husband in 2 months due to being so sick. He’s complained a few times but he is understanding. To top it off, I discovered that he has several porn videos bookmarked on his laptop. I’m not sure how to feel about this. A part of me thinks, “ who cares it’s just a fake movie and besides what is he supposed to do” but then another part of me can’t help but to feel even worse about myself. It almost feels like I’m being cheated on. My husband has always claimed to be a Christian which is another reason why I feel uneasy, he claims to be this certain type of guy yet secretly uses porn? I guess I’m not sure how I feel about it or what I should do. I’m conflicted between leaving it alone because I can’t physically please him right now and he needs something or if I want to say something. But I’m not even sure what I’d say because I’m not 100% sure how I truly feel. What are your opinions?