Ok so me and my husband has been married about a month n a week now...pls don’t judge me when I tell you guys this...lately we have been being very private with our phones... it’s not so much that I can’t go thru his phone but more like I know he wants his privacy and he automatically gets in such a bad mood to where he doesn’t even want to kiss me afterwards,so I try my best to give him his privacy. I’m not picking it up going through his messages more like my phone is dead and I wanna watch divorce court on yours. I told him this after I picked it up and it really wasn’t a problem at first but then he was like give me my phone back... I don’t think he is cheating I think he has a serious problem with privacy boundaries... like immediately I pick up his phone and he automatically thinks I’m accusing him of something. Now that was a week ago. I didn’t say anything or argue just gave him his phone because I know how he is about those things (he has no understanding if I try to talk to him right then). So let’s talk about if the shoe is on the other foot shall we? If he ask me for my phone and I ask for it back soon as he picks it up he deems it as suspicious. And I only do it because he wants his privacy and I’m just returning the rule to him. But I don’t have a issue with that and I will tell him that and when I do he just says “so why you acting like it’s a problem” I tell him all the time “ you do the same exact thing” but he claims you still looked at it. So my point is is that last night I told him that I had insecurities and they bother me. And I’ve been trying to give him as much privacy as I can. He says “ that’s not my fault you have insecurities. And don’t take them out on me.” I haven’t picked up his phone since the last week. I was so hurt 😭 I only wanted to talk to him about how I’ve never had a real relationship and now I’m married and it makes me anxious the way he acts. I went on to tell him that I think he has a privacy issue and he admitted that to me. The problem is is that without me telling him he has a privacy issue he would never try to fix it he would automatically blame it on me being sensitive just like he did last night when I cried after he said it wasn’t his fault that I’m insecure... I think it’s his job to comfort me in my weak spots...he isn’t good at expressing his emotions or telling me how he feels! It’s so often that I have to tell him how HE feels and not because I’m controlling his feelings but because he doesn’t know how to word it himself! He always tells me I know him better than he knows himself and that’s why he married me because no one else understands him and is patient. He is a metal box and I don’t know how I ever got through to him. I didn’t even know he felt so strong about me when he proposed I was so shocked... I really had just been taking it slow because we were waiting for each other...I told him he has to make the effort to learn himself so that he can learn me better...if he knew me better he would know that I don’t think he cheating I think something is wrong with him when it comes to privacy...now he admitted this too me!! So I’m not crazy I made sure that he just isn’t anyone who wants privacy but he said it shouldn’t bother him like that but it does... and he knows he needs to work on it... Jesus this man doesn’t know himself and I married him because I do know him 😭 I had to teach him how to love and be gentle with me now I have to teach him the appropriate way to act and how to seek help... he has let me go thru his phone on numerous occasions even at random moments but it’s not about him doing something he has no business doing it’s about his privacy🤷🏽‍♀️

I love him and we ain’t getting a divorce our only option is for me to keep teaching him about himself!!! Would this not drive y’all crazy or is it just me 😭😭😭