I just needed to vent for a second because today has been really hard and I just don't know why. I feel so overwhelmed and unprepared.

Baby doesn't latch so I've been giving her formula while I try to pump. Milk finally came in today but it's still such a small amount that I wasn't able to produce enough for a feeding even though I pumped all day.

I dont know what I was expecting but that was very discouraging.

She has her first doctors appointment tomorrow and I don't want to leave the house. I layed on the floor with her for a while today and I felt so guilty as I burst into quiet tears while she just stared at me. I'm surprised my husband didnt notice (but also not). I'm glad he didnt, luckily I've been successful kn hiding my little meltdowns today. I dont have an answer for him as to why I'm upset and I can only take hearing "it's all going to be okay" so much when I'm not even sure what IT is.

I'm sure it's just the baby blues or whatever but I really hope tomorrow goes a little bit better. It's only been a few days.