I’m just going to throw my story out here. I think all new moms who are set of breast feeding need to hear this.

I hope it works out for you. But go into it knowing even the best plans have to change sometimes.

When my daughter was born, I was dead set on nursing. That was the only option.

I couldn’t.

I never produced enough. I did everything the lactation nurse had me do. I spent hundreds on renting a hospital grade pump, special teas, prescriptions, herbal supplements. I drank a ton of water and pumped every two hours on the dot. I was sleep deprived even more than I would have been with a new baby. I could only line the bottom of the bottles. They would have me nurse and then weigh my daughter to see if she got anything. Never enough.

I came back in for my last appointment. “How’s the pumping every two hours?” I admitted that I needed sleep and couldnt keep waking up to nurse, then pump, then supplement with formula. Put her back to bed.. just to wake up and do it all over again.

I got a flipping lectured about “breast is best.” I sat in the doctors office, sobbing. Holding my beautiful new baby. I was ruining my daughters health. And this lady just reminded me of it.

I did this for almost a month. My body refused to “do what it was made to do.” I felt like a failure. I spent most of the first month of her life worried about producing milk. I was a mess. NO NEW MOM SHOULD FEEL THIS WAY. We should be supported in whatever feeding decision we make or have to make. I didn’t choose formula. But formula saved her life. She would have starved to death if I didn’t supplement. my daughter is almost two and super healthy. All the stuff I was told would happen to her using formula didn’t happen. Regardless of how a mother feeds her baby, FED IS BEST.

What kills me is these lactation ladies looked at my breasts, and the shape and the size and said. “Did they grow any?” No. “Well they sit far apart and kinda flat, women with breasts like yours can’t always produce milk.” Why in the hell did they lecture me and put me through a month of crap when most likely I wouldn’t be able to?!?! I wasn’t in sound mind at that time. The hormones were going crazy. Now I’m like... why did I put myself through all that?

Because we want the best for our children. And when one idea is shoved down your throat by so many, sometimes we don’t see the bigger picture. I’m about to have my second... this time I will try, but I already have formula and bottles ready to go. I won’t let them bully me. And if breast feeding isn’t for you, and you already know you want to use formula, great! That’s your call and don’t like anyone try to tell you any differently. Formula is not poison.