I am happily married to my husband. We have been married for almost 2 yrs now and have a 3yr old son but we’ve been together for about 8 yrs total but 5 years solid now. We dated in high school then broke up and went out separate ways for awhile then reconnected through a mutual friend.

Well before he came back into the picture I met a guy through work we’ll call him Dave and we hit it off quickly as friends. We flirted heavily but never took it out of the friend zone. I ended up dating Dave’s roommate for awhile and he ended up being very abusive. When I ended things with him he started stalking me so I had friends including Dave take turns staying with me at my apartment because I was afraid to stay alone. Well Dave stayed one night we eventually ended up hooking up(we claim it was due to alcohol) but we never spoke about what happened or let it effect our friendship.

Fast forward to now. He is still a really good friend of mine as well as one of my husband’s best friends. My husband knows we text and stuff. *HE KNOWS OUR HISTORY AND THAT WE HOOKED UP ONCE! He’s fine with us being friends.

Well, awhile back I was texting with Dave, and I knew he had been drinking some, and we got to talking more into detail about the abuse I went through with his roommate. He kept apologizing for not figuring it out and helping me and for introducing me to him to start with. Then the topic changed

He gets really silly when he drinks and he was making stupid jokes like normal and I commented about how drinking too much gets him into trouble sometimes and Then our hookup got brought up and he made a comment about how he enjoyed being with me. Like I said we’ve never talked about it.. I had real feelings for him back then like I loved him!! and he had feelings for me but we couldn’t act on it due to our jobs. We both worked for my family’s business and they didn’t approve of him. They would have made his life hell or tried to fire him or both of us! That’s why we kept it in the friend zone.

We now have a cruise vacation planned and paid for (Dave, my husband, and myself) but every time I talk to Dave things tend to get really flirty now. We’ve always joked around and been slightly flirty with each other. We just have that type of personality and friendship but here lately it’s been Like when we first met. Over the past few weeks I’ve been having these dreams about him and I can’t make them stop! I LOVE my husband! I’m happy being with my husband but I can’t stop these dreams. My friend keeps telling me that it’s normal to fantasize about another man from time to time and that it will pass. Is this feeling normal though? I don’t want to lose my friendship with Dave and I don’t want my husband to lose his friendship either. But most of all I don’t want it to effect my marriage!

I probably need to add that my husband has been working a lot of crazy hours lately and I’ve been stressed and mostly stuck at home with our son. My dad is living with us now temporarily and I basically have a house full of people at all times. My husband and I have been trying to have another baby for over 6 months now and it’s just not happening so I’ve been getting discouraged!

I don’t feel like I would/could ever cheat on my husband but these dreams kinda feel like I am! Am I wrong for feeling this way over something out of my control?