I’m having such a bad day, I’m moody as hell and Im so emotional today, so what I thought af was coming since I had cramps turns out the bitch didn’t want to turn up when she was meant to and to make me even more upset I took a test and it was negative, I’m tired ive got a heavy feeling in my lower abdomen, my ovaries keep doing this weird feeling thing and I feel so sickly it’s unreal I’m hungry and bloated like hell and I’ve been ttc for nearly a damn year and I just want to sit and cry because nothing ever seems to go right for me, I had a miscarriage and lost our #1 in 2017 I then found out I had PCOS the same day on my scan. I went to the doctor to find out more about it and they tell me that I don’t look like I have got it but the scans of my ovaries show different, we then started trying for a baby after my mental breakdown and trying to fix myself after the miscarriage! I can’t get help until over a year goes past and I don’t know if I’ve got any more hope left in me, I’ve tried so damn hard in life, I went to college I got a job, I passed my driving test at the age of 17-18 I’m saving my hardest to buy our own first house and not once have I moaned about working hours and hours for what I’ve got but when people get things given to them, houses, having the chance to be pregnant and having babies, cars all without a job and they just get all the happiness that some people try their hardest to get! I’m tired of working my hardest and getting nothing but shit thrown at me! I honestly don’t want to give up but what’s the point in fighting for everything you want and have for it never to come true or to be taken away! I honestly hate this past year nothing but heart ache and tears! Whoever decides to read this long ass rant thank you I just needed to get it off my chest because trying for a baby is never ending 😫