Ohmygosh,ohmygosh,okso

My crush one of my close friends and I asked her if she liked me (we're both pan, I'm a girl, she is gender flux between girl and non-binary) and she said no but we're still REALLY good friends (probably closer than before)

By the way, this all happens in the ballet locker room and M is our friend and E is my crush. And gayf is an inside joke.

So the other day she kisses my friend M on the check and M says "E, that's gayyyyf" (thats an inside joke) and E (my crush) says "It's normal in France! See look!" AND I DONT REALLY KNOW HOW IT HAPPENED BUT SHE WAS LIKE "WATCH" and then somehow I ended up kissing her on the cheek but it was actually a PECK because I'm an IDOIT😂

And. My. Face. Was. A CHEREY. OF COURSE. IT ALWAYS IS. And then she kissed me on the cheek and it didn't feel bad. I didn't even care that other girls in the ballet locker room were probably looking at us weirdly (I didn't turn around to look because I wasn't gonna ruin it by being insecure) but my point is:

Okay one more story for more info:

We're at a bat mitzvah (if you don't know what that is, it's a big party to celebrate a Jewish girl becoming a woman) anyway, were dancing together, holding hands (to stay together so we don't get lost in the crowd), I helped her on and off this platform stage thing for a group picture, and there was a photo booth where we took a ton of pictures of us hugging and me thinking "this is so gay but she said she didn't like me that way last month? ...maybe she said yes but i thought the text said no?" But she later said that the only reason she said no was because she was scared to be in a relationship and she was scared that she would do something wrong or the other person would be invasive (which I get) but it seems like once she becomes more comfortable with the idea of being in a relationship she might change her mind? We look like a gay couple all the time. Oh my SHIT! I AM SO GAYYY SOMEONE HELP MEEEEE