Baby story: First trimester
🌱🐣 Okay well I made another post after the ultrasound regarding the gender and guessing it - but I suppose wives tales only get you so far; I'll just have to wait another month or so. BUT IM JUST SO EXCITED! ✨
So this is our first pregnancy. It came as a total shock (my fiancé was told he was infertile!) and we found out just 2 weeks ago today. (I'll be 12 weeks tomorrow). 🙊🙈🙉
My fiancé and I became officially engaged a couple months ago 💍 and that was when our little one was conceived (figures😘!).
I've been struggling with accepting that I'm pregnant as I have always had high expectations for myself and how I wanted my life to be set up before TTC, for the sake of providing a comfortable life for my child. 🍃 Then there's the moral piece: wanting to be married first. But regardless of that, and my public and self image, God had bigger plans. 🙏🏼
The Holy Spirit spoke to me when I was flying home, the day before I found out I was pregnant, and He told me to trust Him. I started crying right there at 3500ft. ✈️😭💕 Now I'm learning to trust, and "lean not on my own understanding".
Since then it's been hard: breaking the news to family, keeping the secret from friends, and battling embarrassment.
But then today happened; my mother accompanied me to my ultrasound 🏥 and I saw my baby. Confirming more than a pee test that my bump isn't just abnormal bloating. ;)
He/she tossed and turned and stretched and coiled up... 👶🏼 2 inches, perfectly healthy, growing like a weird little bean thing, due Feb 24, 2016 ...and the reality hit me, and I couldn't live in denial of it anymore. 💕 I've been out of my mind excited since. I can't stop smiling. ☺️🌿
I have quite a road ahead but I'm trying to put negativity in the grave and rejoice for this gift of life and purpose to mine.
I don't care if anyone reads this or not, I've just been through a very traumatic past 4 years and needed to share this. :)
Here's a photo from today. My joy.