Tomorrow is the day my period is supposed to start, although deep down in side I wish it wouldn’t. I wish I didn’t have a sick feeling in my stomach every month around this time, doubting I’ll ever get those two lines... but still holding out hope that by some miracle I’ll be blessed in nine months with a healthy baby 😔😴 after trying for a year & a half though, it’s hard to have any hope... it’s hard to not just already see the one line, it’s hard to not be scared every time I go to the bathroom that I’ll see blood from my period. It’s hard having nobody to talk to because nobody knows except my boyfriend that we’ve even been trying. It’s hard to hear everyone ask “when will you have kids” & fake a smile & pretend we don’t know. It’s hard hearing my mom talk about grandkids while never knowing if I’ll ever be able to give her any.. it’s hard seeing everyone else have babies some of which where not even wanted meanwhile my prayer every night is the same for the past year & a half. It’s hard. It’s all just so hard.