One child and done?

Question

So I thought I’d start with a little background 😀 I am 36 years young 👀 When I was younger I always said I wanted about 4 kids, however, at the age of 25 I unfortunately had 3 miscarriages, 1st and 3rd were around the 6 week mark whilst the second was a missed M/C near 13 weeks. My relationship broke down after this and I enjoyed my time being single and finding happiness within myself again. When I was 30 I met the most amazing man and we married 3 years later. We found out a year later we were expecting and have the most amazing daughter who is almost 18 months 😍 We found out earlier this year we were expecting again (not planned). I felt so much guilt for our daughter as she was still so young but after seeing the baby’s heartbeat at an early scan I knew everything would be just fine 😊 Unfortunately at our 3 month scan we learned the baby no longer had a hb and I had to have another D&C. We found out the baby was a little boy with an extra chromosome not compatible with life 💙 Since then I have went back to thinking I am happy and blessed with our daughter and want to put all my attention into her. She is the lucky one who made it through out of 5 pregnancies. HOWEVER, I feel guilty that she will be lonely but I then think I can’t have another child for the wrong reasons. Being an adult is hard work sometimes 😪 Looking to hear from anyone who is feeling similar or have had one child only and did it effect them at all or are they a happy child on their own 💓

Answer

I feel like it would be hard as an adult with no siblings! When your parents pass or get sick and you have to deal with it on your own!
After my mom passed I was so grateful to have my brothers to help me be there for my dad! Just to stop by for visits and keep him company.

Answer

Although I have a half brother, I never ever see him. 16 years apart too, Iv always felt like an only child! My mum had me at 39 and I have to admit I did want a sister at some point but I was honestly fine, there are perks, like all the attention is on you and I guess I’ll never know what it’s like to have a sibling and I’m okay with that! She will be fine, she may want a sibling somewhen but I never bothered my mum over it so I doubt she will either, it’s just the way things are :) I had friends call me spoilt but hey my mum didn’t have to spilt her money like theirs (she was mostly a single parent after my dad left) the mother and daughter bond is amazing :) don’t feel guilty, she will get every ounce of your attention and love which is what counts 😌

Answer

I’m 21 and i just had my little princess ( she’s 3 months ) she’s such a good baby and i feel like if i had another one i wouldn’t get as lucky so i only want the one . My husband always gets mad at me because he wants a lot of kids but i don’t think there’s anything wrong with just one ! Does she have any cousins her age ? Because that’s another thing my sisters kids are close in age with my daughter and we’re a close family so her cousins will almost be like her siblings . I can’t imagine giving my love and attention to any other babies 😩but yeah i definitely understand i had a Miscarriage before i had my baby and then i had her but the whole pregnancy up until the time i pushed her out i was soooo scared something would go wrong so i don’t wanna go through the scariness again

Answer

I wish my aunt could answer this.  My aunt was perfectly content with not being a mom...then she had a surprise pregnancy at 39.
She struggled with the idea of her child being an only.  She got pregnant with her second around 41 and learned it was a blighted ovum at her 12 week scan.  She said that was her sign her surprise child was meant to be an only.
It really is a tough decision.  The only thing I can say is that the idea of having siblings might be comforting but it doesn’t guarantee they will be close.   Likewise, a kid can experience a sibling like experience with cousins or friends.
Good luck.  I wish you peace in this decision making process.

Answer

I’ve always wanted 2, maybe 3 kids. I got married later than I would have liked, struggled with infertility and a few miscarriages and finally had my daughter. She’s 18 months old. I’m 39 and my husband is 42. We also have a huge amount of IVF debt. I go back an forth daily about what bothers me more, not giving my daughter a sibling or taking on more debt to possibly have another miscarriage. There’s no right answer. It’s a tough spot. I try to remember how grateful I am to have my daughter and whatever else happens or doesn’t, at least I have her. Good luck to you.

Answer

I’m only 26 and husband is 28 but at the minute we are saying this baby will be our only child. Obviously things may change in the future but we don’t want more kids than we can comfortably afford. I know plenty of people now who only have one child for various reasons. 
If we were to have another child we would need to move to a bigger house which means taking out a mortgage as we currently own our home outright and I would have to majorly cut down on hours at work as I earn a lot less an hour than hubby so another child would be a big financial strain for us. 
If you are happy with your little baby don’t feel like you have to have a second; do what’s best for you and your family 💕

Answer

I have one and I'm only having one lol fuck that birthing shit. I went unmedicated and it was bananas and also I have an incompetent cervix. I almost lost my daughter at 23w. I'm totally okay with one. She has plenty of cousins around her age.

Answer

My mom wanted 6 kids! She had to have an abortion with twins before they got married because of health stuff and too many complications. She couldn’t be on birth control because of all of the medication she was taking already. She had my brother and he was very early and weighed one pound and her doctor said to either try for another as soon as possible or not at all, and then she had me almost 2 years later and that was it. She has PCOS and had a brain tumor and other health stuff, so it was just all around very hard for her. I’d imagine I might have complications with fertility when I get there in the future, but I really hope I can have one of my own. I honestly think we need to get rid of the only child stigma. I don’t think it’s a bad thing at all.

One child and done?

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