Labia swell up, burning during and after sex, help!

San • A 22 years old with a loving bf that's 5 years older. Interracial couple. Love him💕
Hi! I started dating this man who I believe to be the "ONE" everything with him is perfect! EXCEPT!  How my lady(vagina)'s labia react after or during sex!! It is so painful to the touch and even as much as I try to avoid touching it, peeing after sex hurt and pad dry hurt!! My labias(vagina lips) would swell up and the rim around it burn and it feels like it has been stretched out to the max. There is nothing else worst than the feeling of your private area feels like it's been ripping apart(that what I imagine compare to the pain). I first thought it was my Yeast infection/discharges but then months go by and everytime whether if he was fingered me or made love to me it would swell up and burn! I love him so during or after when it hurt I just don't say anything to him and wait until I see my ob/gyn doctor. But all she recommended was coconut oil! I want to know what's the problem to prevent it from happening. The only thing I seem to have in mind was his dipping Grizzly habit. We don't use condom because I'm tiny and sensitive, our lubricant is his spit. I mean I can't think of anything else.