Hi guys. I tried to find my answer before posting but I guess I’m just picky..

I’m nervous. First post! So here goes:

I’m 22. My entire life I’ve had a high libido, think I’ve been masturbating since 13 lost my virginity at 16 and started dabbling in rougher play pretty soon after. Nothing crazy on the BDSM scale but the heavier choking and some light bondage, a couple of unsuccessful anal experiments over the years of 16-20. I’ve had many sexual and a few romantic relationships.

I like sex, I still occasionally masturbate or at least mindlessly touch myself. If it gets heavy I HAVE to finish - but if it’s mild petting I’m lazy and don’t care too much.

Well I’ve been with the same partner for 3 years (officially engaged as of last month!) and he’s stuck by my side through it all. Including the loss of libido. Like one day, it just shut off sometime a year or so ago. And I feel guilty - so once in a while we’ll still have sex. But it’s been a solid year without now.

He watched porn - I admit to my insecurities but don’t deny him from it since I’m not really around to help out with his sex drive. Although he’s also admitted to not really having a desire to watch porn anymore (past six months).

I should admit openly prior to loss of libido we did have a situation and lose a child. Abortion by choice. I’m not here for anti abortion comments, keep them to yourself. I’m emotionally fine. It was mutual and necessary. But I’ve heard it can negatively affect women’s hormones and don’t know how credible my research is?

We have a fantastic romantic relationship. There’s no lack of passion - obviously or we wouldn’t be getting married. We flirt and make out all the time. Sometimes but rarely he’ll try for more but my brain just shuts down and I stop functioning when I know he wants sex. I can NOT do it. And he respects that.

But I’m scared for the wedding night and moving forward. How can we communicate? I know he’s happy but how can I do more of what would satisfy him? Would you consider me a part of the asexual spectrum?

It’s funny. I used to think I had it all figured out. Now I’m 22 and know nothing.

TLDR; I think I’m Ace but I haven’t always been so I’m confused and I’m getting married and I want to make sure I can keep him happy and interested in the years to come. Help!?

nudes

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