I just need to vent this out and talk to someone other than my boyfriend. I’m 31 weeks pregnant this week. Idk where else to turn as I don’t have any friends in this state. This probably isn’t the right page to post this, if there is a better one please redirect me!

My boyfriend and I moved states 7 months ago, the first person to want to meet us was his great aunt (age 75 I think)....she actually wanted us to move in with her and her grown son (age 40?) Even though we had never met before and we have two large dogs. Anyways we moved into our apartment, and a couple weeks later we traveled the trip north to see her. I was....well I was a little more than shocked when we got to her house. I’m guessing she is a hoarder of some sort, or she just hates to clean? Her house was absolutely disgusting to me and I cannot get over the weirdness of it. Ive never been to a house like this so I don’t know if I’m being naive or judgemental/overreacting. I won’t go into many details but there was trash and random things just piled everywhere, a turtle cage when you first walked in with so many flies inside I thought the animals were dead, trash cans stuff and overflowing with trash just sitting around, the kitchen had no counter space because there was stuff just stacked and pushed around all over the place and flies everywhere. Although she somehow managed to make food for us (ribs and corn) in this kitchen. The floor was sticky and she said “sorry I didn’t clean, I poured apple cider vinegar on the floor before you arrived” (???) and also had random trash just laying on the ground or piled into corners. Also the kitchen area had two small litter boxes accompanied by piles of newspaper with cat feces and urine all over the place. She has 6 cats and 2 small dogs, and livestock like sheep that live outside. I assume her son doesn’t help clean or doesn’t care. He drank the whole time we were there (not judging this at all as I used to love to partake before I got pregnant but I feel it might be why he was acting the way he did). He gave me strange vibes. As we were walking out to leave he gave me a hug around my waist a little too low and a little too tight and whispered “you’re family now” in my ear, away from my boyfriend. I tensed up instantly. I was extremely unsettled by this, but I also have some ptsd/anxiety issues, and I feel like maybe I’m just overreacting. But what the hell. I’m really trying hard not to be judgmental because this is my boyfriends family, and I have a reputation for being a bitch on his mom’s side already. but all of this just threw me for a loop.

I found out I was pregnant a little bit after visiting her home, and this aunt somewhat latched onto me since then and it just bothers me a lot. I don’t know how to feel, I know she’s very lonely but I can’t get over our visit. I try to avoid visiting again, we truly are busy with appointments and our budget is tight right now. But she keeps arranging things, texting me a lot, and inviting us to family events with her, her son and her daughter. She keeps trying to give me things, which I’m grateful for but when we can’t meet up at the times she would like, she kind of makes me feel like an asshole saying “since we’re having a hard time getting together I’ll just mail your pregnancy pillow to you, etc”. She visited us once in our town since then and it was stressful to me. I’m dreading giving birth in January because I know she will want to be involved, but she has hygiene issues and I’m a germaphobe and I can’t get over seeing her nails caked with gross shit at the restaurant when she came to visit us, or the condition of her house. When I give birth I don’t want anyone to be there beside my boyfriend and his father and I know she will want to be there. I’m already having issues mentally with people not being vaccinated and who will be kissing/touching my child when he’s here and as my due date gets closer she keeps texting more, inviting us to thanksgiving/Christmas events which I already told her I’m in a lot of pain (my pelvis hurts like a mofo) and car rides are hard for me right now. I’m also a huge home body and have been enjoying the holidays with my boyfriend at our apartment for the first time this year cooking and whatnot (every other year we went to his moms for Xmas and thanksgiving).

I can’t tell if I just have pregnant hormones raging through me or what.

Can anyone offer some advice from an outsiders point of view? What do you guys think? Am I just an asshole that’s already way too overprotective of my unborn child? Thanks in advance and sorry for such a lengthy post😞. I’m 31 weeks pregnant and really stressed out by a lot of things right now and I just need someone to talk to that can help me think rationally.

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