My little 34 weeker was admitted to children’s mercy this past week. While there they discovered my little one has 2 atrial septal defects and that his PDA never closed like it should have. He has had some symptoms that pointed to it as well I just never knew what they meant. I seriously never thought I would ever hear someone tell me my child has a congenital heart defect. Everything after that kind of became a blur. But we are home now thankfully. And even though I do not want to go back we have serval follow ups with the surgery clinic, the cardiologist, respiratory clinic and his normal pediatrician. I’ve added more medical words to my vocabulary. I’ve stared at my little man and wondered what I did wrong. I feel like I failed him, I couldn’t keep him in for him to develop more. I feel like as a mother I should have been able to keep him in longer I wonder if he would have any of these issues if I could have kept him in longer. But the rational part of me knows that it’s not the case. He most definitely is the strongest little boy I know after everything he has been put through in only 7 weeks. I’m amazed at my little warrior