Husband and I have been together for over a year. And I am just now learning about the way his mother is!

I usually haven't had any issues with her. She has been super helpful since we told her we're pregnant and has bought us a lot for the baby. We have always told her how thankful we are for everything she has done.

We got a new kitten 3 days ago. My husband was SO worried about announcing our newest family member on facebook, and I completely didn't understand why!

I finally talked him into letting me post about the kitten, and then I get a screenshot from my husband of the text his mother sent him... "since you have 4 new paws in your home, you can come here and get your christmas presents."

She says she's allergic to cats. And I totally get that. But the cat is 8 weeks old right now. She weighs less than 2 pounds. And I have seen my MIL around cats before and she never had a reaction. 🙄

She has apparently texted my husband about other things in his life as well. He is a big gamer, and does live streams of his gaming. He also vapes. The vape doesn't bother me. He doesn't vape when I am sitting right next to him. She apparently started watching one of his live streams and then called him the next day YELLING at him about vaping...

She lectured me about how MY mother needs to get her TDap vaccine before the baby comes or she shouldn't be allowed to see him. She also lectured me about getting a job before the baby comes because my husband shouldn't have to do it all himself.

Mind you all, we are MARRIED, 22 and 25 year old ADULTS, with our own baby on the way! And she apparently feels the need to control every last detail of our lives...

I really want to text her and tell her we are grown ass adults who make our own decisions and when she starts paying our bills, she can then control the decisions we make inside our own home.

I lost a lot of respect for her today. She's refusing to come over to see us at all now because of the cat (as if we can't lock the cat away in our bedroom for the 2 hours she would be here, since she NEVER stays any longer than that). I want to tell her if she doesn't want to come see her only grandchild after he's born, then that's her problem. 🤷🏼‍♀️

We aren't getting rid of our cat and we certainly aren't going to be traveling an hour to go see my MIL less than a week after I have given birth. We are willing to make accommodations for her in our home but if she isn't willing to work with them, then I don't know what else we can do for her.