Dependency? I Need help!!!

Question

So I am kinda of dependent on my boyfriend and I am in college and he is a senior in. High school. I hate it at my college but I take a course at another university that I have a lot more friends at.  I’m transferring next year but this year I’m scared about what me and my boyfriend are going to do. He is totally fine with going about his day. Doesn’t question anything with the relationship but I feel like I need constant attention to make me happy and I stress myself out because I overthink everything. Can anyone please give me tips on how to fix this. I really don’t want to take a break with my boyfriend but I want to make this work.

Answer

Hey I’m in the exact same situation (at least I think I am). I’m super dependent on my boyfriend because despite all the loving people surrounding me he’s the only one I let in enough to see me in my down moments. I’ve always been independent and at times emotionally detached from others and he’s the only person that knows all of my troubles. I need constant reassurance from him because he’s the only one I let myself be ‘weak’ around so he’s the only one who can help me when I start to feel bad. I’m moving away in a couple months for university while he’s staying here to do a course (he would be in his last year at high school too but he decided that he’d be happier training for his future job). My advice is to let your boyfriend know how you feel and to always keep him in the loop. Communication is such an important thing in an honest relationship, and I know everyone says it but it’s true. The hardest times in my relationship have always been the moments where I stop communicating due to insecurities. Guys function on a different level to us and won’t always understand what’s wrong without a little help. My boyfriend never has any doubt in us and in seems like yours doesn’t have any doubt as well. As long as both sides are willing to make things work then you just have to have a little faith in each other. In addition to communication, I’d try to address any other issues that make you feel so dependent. I know I feel guilty because of how needy I am but he always reassures me that he likes feeling needed. Try to talk to openly about it to ease your guilt. If your dependancy stems from your relationships with other people or insecurities than let him help you open up to others and love yourself more. It’ll take time and it’s definitely not easy but you won’t have to do it alone. A relationship is about helping each other become better versions of yourselves (or at least that’s how I think about it). I’m sorry that there’s no one answer to fixing the problem but I hope this helps and if you need anyone else to talk to than I’d be happy to make another friend xx

Answer

I would try and get on the same emotional level or at least get him to understand yours. Just tell him what your concerns are and how you'd like to move forward with the relationship. I'd say if that doesn't fix it then you may want to break up until you've transferred and this isn't a problem for you anymore. But either way, don't let anything or anyone interfere in your studies. Good luck!

Dependency? I Need help!!!

The Top Baby Tracker App: Embrace New Beginnings with Tender Care

The Top Fertility Tracker App: Your Path to Achieving Pregnancy

The Top Pregnancy App: Nurturing Your Journey to Motherhood

The Top Period Tracker for Empowering Your Menstrual Health Journey