Need to vent.... trying to conceive

Why does anyone think it is their business to ask if and when you will be having a child.

I may or may not have fertility issues. I may or may not be having sex with my husband on the right days.

I am not on birth control. Haven’t been for two years. I do not want medication that may or may not help my fertility issue caused by PCOS and Hashimoto’s disease.

To the family member asking if I should be drinking margaritas because they are wondering if I am pregnant. NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS (FYI... wouldn’t be drinking margaritas if I was... duh!). To my mother constantly making comments about the future of grandchildren. NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. Plus, your an alcoholic and unable to be trusted alone with those grandchildren you speak of. So there is that. For those random family friends joking about the grandchildren soon to come... NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!

Why do we live in a culture that is so focused on wondering about the fertility of others. Why is this the focus? Why do I need to fight so hard against doctors trying to prescribe me medication? Why can’t I just let nature take its course. Do I need to take ovulation tests and time everything to make sure I have intercourse at exactly the right time. I understand completely the strong desire to have children and how it is necessary to do that and try everything to make it happen. But shouldn’t it also be ok to NOT do everything to conceive but let nature take its course. Can’t I be in between!? Can’t I feel curious about being a mother but also be ok with not being a mother? Must I pressure my husband to have sex based on when I think I may be ovulating?

To all the women out there that are somewhere in the in between. Between wondering if you are fertile and wondering if you do want to be a mother and being jealous when it isn’t you who are pregnant and wondering what your baby would look like, a beautiful blend of yourself and the one you love. I See You. And I hope you see me too.