I need help

I will spare you all the details, but I need help. I can’t keep acting like I’m okay when I’m not. I don’t know if I’m trying to be strong, or if something is wrong with me. I want to cry or scream and I just can’t. I have moments of happiness, but they are fleeting. I plan to get in touch with a counselor, but in the meantime, just want someone to vent to without looking at me like I’m broken. I am broken, but I don’t need to be reminded of it whenever someone looks at me.